Motherhood is incredibly rewarding and fulfilling, but it’s also hard. Some would argue it’s one of the most challenging jobs you’ll ever have. Being a mom often means feeling overwhelmed and exhausted as you juggle household responsibilities, manage work and family life, and try to maintain some sense of a social life.
The parenting stress moms face is no joke, and the impact can be far-reaching — motherhood stress can affect both physical and mental health. If you’re a stressed mom, don’t lose hope. Utilizing the right stress management strategies can really help.
Keep reading to explore 10 effective coping tips to help stressed moms regain balance and joy in life. You deserve to be the best version of yourself as a mom, and your children deserve that, too.
What Causes Mom Stress?
Understanding the root cause of mom stress is the first step in managing it. Mothers deal with countless stressors every day, and each one can contribute to an overwhelming feeling of being stretched too thin and unable to juggle demands.
Familiar sources of motherhood stress include:
Balancing work and family life: Successfully dealing with professional responsibilities and family obligations can make a working mother feel like they’re in a constant game of tug-of-war. This continuous juggle can lead to burnout — according to research, parental burnout happens all over the world — and makes it impossible for a working mom to succeed in either area.
Managing household responsibilities: Keeping the house clean, shopping for and preparing meals, handling never-ending piles of laundry, and managing basic household maintenance can contribute to a high-stress level and make it feel like you have an endless to-do list you just can’t get through.
Dealing with childcare & education: Staying on top of emails with teachers, coordinating schedules, helping with homework, and ensuring your child gets the best care possible is demanding, time-consuming, and stressful.
Financial pressure: Trying to provide for the family while managing expenses adds another incredible layer of parenting stress to your job.
Lack of personal time: Finding moments for self-care or time to relax can often fall to the bottom of your list.
Health and well-being concerns: Worrying about your health or the health of a child can be a significant source of anxiety and stress for any parent.
Relationship strains: Navigating marital or partnership dynamics and ensuring you still have enough energy to pay attention to the children can create tension and conflict that are difficult to overcome.
Society, expectations, and comparisons: The pressure to meet the demands of society, combined with the inclination to compare yourself to other moms, can lead to feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt.
Sleep deprivation and fatigue: Most moms suffer from a lack of sufficient sleep at some point. Research shows that fatigue can exacerbate stress and negatively impact mental and physical health.
Emotional and mental health challenges: When a mom is dealing with parental anxiety, depression, or any other mental health condition, it adds to the daily struggles and stress of motherhood.
“Motherhood goes hand in hand with our internal biases and aspirations, as we all grow up acknowledging things we do and don’t want to be or be like. With that comes all the external pressures in our families and environments. When we finally arrive, the challenges of “balance” can take us by surprise. Commit early to the things that make you characteristically happy, and don’t refuse yourself those opportunities, even if they are brief, to indulge. That will keep you actively engaged instead of woefully passive in the mundane.”
– Talkspace therapist Elizabeth Keohan, LCSW-C
10 Ways to Cope with Mom Stress
Figuring out how to cope with mom stress is essential to living a balanced life. Effective coping strategies can help you navigate the difficulties of motherhood. Here are 10 practical ways to cope with mom stress.
1. Recognize the signs of mom stress
First, one of the most essential ways to deal with motherhood stress is by recognizing there’s an issue in the first place. When you understand you’re stressed, you can learn how to manage it.
Common signs of mom stress include:
Irritability
Fatigue
Difficulty sleeping
Feeling overwhelmed
Loss of appetite
Inability to concentrate
By acknowledging your symptoms, you can take proactive steps to address them before they escalate into something much worse.
2. Carve out “mommy me-time” for self-care regularly
When dealing with mom stress, that analogy about putting on your oxygen mask first rings true.
Dedicating time for yourself every day – even just a few minutes – helps you recharge and improve your mood. Do you enjoy reading, working out, or taking a bath? Self-care for parents is essential for managing emotional well-being.
3. Establish a support system
Support is crucial for moms. Surround yourself with people who understand your challenges and can relate to the mom stress you experience. Friends, family, and other moms can offer you emotional support, practical help, and a sense of community that can get you through the tough days.
4. Set realistic expectations
Feel like you’re failing as a parent? Being realistic about what you can do and setting goals you can actually achieve will help you let go and accept your limitations. Ultimately, setting realistic goals and healthy expectations can allow you to slow down and focus on what truly matters.
5. Learn to delegate responsibilities
Being a good mom doesn’t mean doing everything yourself. Delegating tasks and responsibilities to others—your partner, older children, hired help—will reduce your workload so you have the time to take care of the things you need to do.
6. Incorporate mindfulness and relaxation techniques
Practicing mindfulness meditation or deep breathing exercises for anxiety and stress helps you calm your mind and reduce stress.
“The proof is in the pudding regarding the benefits of meditation, mindfulness, yoga, and all of the above. A mindful perspective is known to lower cortisol, our stress hormone, which decreases our stress experience and prevents disease and chronic stress in the body. An easy proactive breath practice or even a brief yoga session can do the trick. Mindfulness is a win-win for moms.”
– Talkspace therapist Elizabeth Keohan, LCSW-C
7. Create a daily routine
Daily routines aren’t only good for the kids. Structure and routine give everyone stability and predictability in their days. A consistent schedule helps you manage your time more effectively and can help you fit new, important priorities in. Routines can reduce the chaos in life that leads to stress and mom burnout.
8. Seek professional help if needed
There’s no denying it: being a mom is hard. At some point, you might feel that you need professional help. Seeking help is brave and strong — it’s not a sign of weakness.
Signs that you might need help can include:
Prolonged feelings of sadness
Inability to stop crying
Anxiety
Anger
Being unable to sleep or sleeping too much
Change in appetite
Having trouble functioning in your daily life
Not performing primary self-care, like showering or getting dressed
Using substances like drugs or alcohol as coping tools
Self-medicating
Thoughts of leaving
Thoughts of self-harm
9. Connect with other moms
Building connections with other moms who can relate to your experience can be incredibly comforting and rewarding. Join mom groups, set up and attend play dates, or find online forums where you can exchange advice and stories and find support. Additionally, consider checking with local schools to see if Early Head Start or Head Start programs are available in your area. These programs can provide valuable resources and support for both you and your child. You can learn more about these programs through Child Care’s official website.
10. Prioritize your physical health
As a busy mom, finding the time to prioritize your physical health can be difficult. However, taking care of yourself is critical to having the energy to take care of your children and manage your stress.
Make sure you get enough sleep, eat balanced and nutritious meals, engage in regular physical activity, and take care of regular doctor appointments. Remember that staying in good physical health is a natural energy boost and will help you build resilience.
Overcoming Your Mom Stress
Mom stress can feel debilitating and overwhelming, but the good news is that it’s possible to overcome it. Managing stress and anxiety is essential for your well-being and ability to be a happy, healthy mom. From recognizing the signs of mom stress to finding a support system and practicing self-care, there are effective ways to focus on what matters — being a great mom.
The strategies discussed here are designed to help you manage stress effectively and improve your well-being. Taking care of yourself is not a luxury; it’s a necessity if you want to be a better parent and the best possible version of yourself.
If you still feel stressed, even after implementing some or all of the coping strategies you’ve learned, consider seeking additional support. Talkspace offers convenient and accessible online therapy options to help you navigate the challenges of motherhood.
With Talkspace, you’ll work with a licensed therapist from the comfort of your own home, so you don’t even have to find childcare to get to your appointments. Find out how to get personalized support with Talkspace today.
Sources:
Roskam I, Aguiar J, Akgun E, et al. Parental Burnout Around the Globe: a 42-Country Study. Affective Science. 2021;2(1):58-79. doi:10.1007/s42761-020-00028-4. https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s42761-020-00028-4. Accessed July 23, 2024.
McQuillan ME, Bates JE, Staples AD, Deater-Deckard K. Maternal stress, sleep, and parenting. Journal of Family Psychology. 2019;33(3):349-359. doi:10.1037/fam0000516. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30762410/. Accessed July 23, 2024.
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