How to Be a Better Parent: 9 Helpful Tips

Parenting is a journey filled with challenges and joy. The highs of watching your young child grow and develop can be quickly tempered by the struggles of managing behavior and caring for their every need. If you’ve ever faced moments of doubt or difficulty in your role as a parent, know that you are not alone. Every parent questions themself or feels defeated at some point. This is why continual improvement and a willingness to learn are so essential. The desire to grow and to become a better parent is the essence of good parenting.

Learn how to become a better parent here, whether you’re navigating the journey of being a single mom or dad, or managing a larger household. We offer 9 helpful parenting tips to raise children in a supportive, nurturing environment. Discover practical, diverse, actionable advice to help you on your path toward being a better parent.

Tip #1 Take Care of Your Own Well-Being

Self-care is a critical part of being an effective parent. Your emotional, physical, and mental health are directly linked to your ability to care for and nurture your children. When you prioritize self-care, you’ll be more likely to have patience, energy, and resilience to handle the taxing demands parenting sometimes requires. 

Self-care can include working out or eating well, getting enough sleep, relaxing, and recharging. It can also involve learning to manage stress in healthy ways and asking for support when needed.

Why this works: Taking care of yourself sets a positive example and models healthy behavior for your children. Research shows that parents who show self-compassion have reduced feelings of guilt and shame about their roles as parents.  

Tip #2 Foster Open Communication

Communication is the cornerstone of a healthy parent-child relationship. Working on open communication in your family dynamic is one of the best things you can do as you focus on how to be good parents. Communication is a parenting skill that stems from creating an environment where children feel safe enough to express what they’re thinking, how they’re feeling, and any concerns they have. Your job is to actively listen and engage in a non-judgmental way.

Why this works: Open communication builds trust and models lifelong healthy communication

skills. Encourage your child to share things with you by asking open-ended questions that show them you care about their experiences. They’ll feel valued and connected to you, opening up in a way that builds their confidence and sense of self-worth.  

“Establishing open communication from an early age builds trust, teaches kids about emotional intelligence, and strengthens the parent-child relationship. Listening more than you talk, being curious instead of judgemental with your questions, and offering your kids a safe space to land allows them to know they can come to you to share their joys and struggles.”

– Talkspace therapist, Jill Daino, LCSW-R

Tip #3 Set Clear Boundaries and Expectations

Establishing boundaries and making expectations clear gives children a sense of security and structure. While kids might think they’d love to have free reign in life and do as they please, the truth is that children thrive when they know rules are in place and understand what’s expected of them. The clarity they gain from having boundaries and expectations makes them feel safe, supported, and loved.

Why this works: This is a crucial aspect of authoritative parenting. Boundaries work because when children know what’s expected, it reduces anxiety and confusion while teaching them self-discipline and responsibility — skills that are crucial for personal development and growth throughout life. 

Tip #4 Prioritize Quality Time Together

Raising happy kids starts by figuring out how to become a better parent, and spending quality time is an easy way to do this. Sharing meaningful moments with your children helps you build a solid and lasting bond. 

A supportive family environment does more than just strengthen the parent-child connection. It shows children how to develop deep, meaningful relationships in their lives. To maximize your time, minimize distractions during these moments — turn off your phones or have “device-free” zones to ensure you have each other’s full attention.

“In this age of heavily scheduled calendars, screen time, and what can feel like not enough time in a week, prioritizing time together as a family is crucial. Quality time connecting without distractions strengthens family bonds while also supporting the emotional and social development of children.”

– Talkspace therapist, Jill Daino, LCSW-R

Why this works: Prioritizing quality time fosters emotional connections between you and your children. Kids who receive focused attention from their caregivers are more likely to develop a secure attachment, which is the healthiest form of attachment and translates to higher self-esteem, better social skills, and healthier relationships in adulthood.

“Being able to connect in this way allows families to have fun, share ideas and experiences, and simply be together in ways that create moments of connectedness that are invaluable. Whether that is doing a puzzle when your child is younger or movie/game night when they are older, finding ways to spend time together at home or out in the world as a family fosters the family bond and child development.”

– Talkspace therapist, Jill Daino, LCSW-R

Tip #5 Teach Responsibility and Independence

Being a better parent means helping your children become independent. Teaching your children to be responsible and independent is vital to their development.  When children are encouraged to find their independence, they learn to solve problems. While you can — and should — support them in finding solutions, allowing them to handle things helps them build confidence so they feel prepared to face challenges later in life.

Do this by giving age-appropriate chores, offering autonomy to make their own decisions, and letting them learn from their experiences and make mistakes. You can start with simple tasks—making their bed or wiping down the sink in the bathroom once a week—and gradually increase the responsibilities as they become ready to take on more. Encourage them to take ownership of their jobs so they can feel a sense of pride in accomplishing tasks and doing well.

Why this works: Teaching kids to be responsible and independent offers them essential life skills for their future. They’ll learn time management, organization, and accountability, often without even knowing it. Independence teaches children to be self-reliant. When they trust they can solve problems on their own, they gain critical thinking and decision-making skills, boosting self-esteem.

Tip #6 Show Unconditional Love and Support

Unconditional love and support are the foundation of healthy parent-child relationships. When children know your love for them is unwavering, regardless of their behavior, it helps them feel secure and valued. A constant and steady show of support reinforces the idea that you’ll be there for them during times of success and failure. Essentially, it develops a pattern where they understand your love is not contingent on performance.

Why this works: Unconditional love helps build confidence and resilience in children. Research shows that children who grow up in a home with unconditional love are more likely to have better stress resilience and healthier brain development. 

Tip #7 Model the Behavior You Expect

Children learn by watching. When your actions are positive, healthy, and kind, kids will want to emulate that in their own behavior. Studies show positive parenting practices influence a child’s development and behavioral outcomes. To model the behavior you want your children to adopt, be mindful of your actions and words. Be willing to apologize when you’re wrong, and live by the values you want them to develop in their own lives. 

Why this works: Children naturally want to emulate their parents. If they see you consistently acting in ways that align with the values you’re hoping to pass on, they’ll be much more likely to behave similarly. Modeling positive behavior also helps children develop healthy emotional and social skills, like communication and conflict resolution. 

Tip #8 Educate Yourself on Child Development

There is great power in educating yourself on how children grow and what they need at different stages in life. Tailoring your parenting style to align with their needs will ensure you can successfully support their emotional, physical, and cognitive development. You can read books, take a parenting class, attend workshops, and even get therapy to help you understand where your child is at. 

Why it works: Knowing how to support your child based on their growth and developmental stages might just be the most powerful tool you have as a parent. Staying educated about your children’s needs can also reduce stress and increase your confidence about being a good parent. 

Tip #9 Maintain Consistency in Discipline

Discipline can be one of the most challenging aspects of parenting, but it’s important to be consistent with it. Consistency means making rules known, enforcing them, and ensuring that all caretakers are on the same page. Being consistent and following through can be difficult, but it pays off. When children understand that rules apply to them and not following them will result in some form of discipline, they learn that their actions have consequences. 

Why this works: Maintaining consistency works because children thrive in a predictable and stable environment where they know what to expect and have clear boundaries. This type of environment helps them feel secure and regulate their behavior. 

In the long run, being consistent with discipline helps kids develop self-control and a sense of responsibility. 

Growing Together as a Family

Learning how to be a better parent isn’t as hard as you might think — especially when you use some of the tips we’ve shared here. These tools will help you focus on raising healthy, happy, resilient kids who know they’re loved and supported. Open communication, setting boundaries, spending time together, teaching them to be responsible and independent, and educating yourself on child development are ways to grow and focus on being a good parent. 

Investing in your growth can be a gift to you and your children. If you need guidance or help in doing this, Talkspace is there for you. Getting convenient, affordable, accessible online therapy can help your family thrive and your children become successful and happy adults. Get online mental health support for parenting from Talkspace today. 

Sources:

Neppl TK, Jeon S, Diggs O, Donnellan MB. Positive parenting, effortful control, and developmental outcomes across early childhood. Developmental Psychology. 2020;56(3):444-457. doi:10.1037/dev0000874. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7041851/. Accessed May 27, 2024.

Danese A, Lewis SJ. Psychoneuroimmunology of Early-Life Stress: The Hidden wounds of Childhood trauma? Neuropsychopharmacology. 2016;42(1):99-114. doi:10.1038/npp.2016.198. https://www.nature.com/articles/npp2016198. Accessed May 27, 2024.

Sirois FM, Bögels S, Emerson LM. Self-compassion improves parental well-being in response to challenging parenting events. Journal of Psychology (Washington, DC Online)/˜the œJournal of Psychology. 2018;153(3):327-341. doi:10.1080/00223980.2018.1523123. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30376651/. Accessed May 27, 2024.

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