Menopause is a natural part of life. However, although this transition is to be expected as we get older, it can still be difficult to give yourself grace during this period, which may be when you need it most. Some women will experience menopausal symptoms leading up to their final menstrual cycle. This includes brain fog, night sweats, menopausal anxiety, and hot flashes. With all of that happening to your body and juggling work and family life, it’s easy to see how your health and well-being can fall by the wayside. But that doesn’t have to be the case.
“Self-love is an act of rebellion when society tells you that you’re not lovable or worthy after something happens in your normal, typical physiology and your natural development,” says board-certified psychiatrist, Dr. Judith Jospeh. “In many cultures across the world, when you live beyond menopause, you are considered blessed, so shifting and reframing the idea of aging rather than viewing your perceived lack of reproductive potential as a negative is just such an act of rebellion.” But how can women practice this self-love? Read below for tips from Dr. Joseph on how women can learn to lean into self-care during their menopausal journey.
Shift your perspective
Oftentimes, aging can be used as a punchline, which can make women feel ashamed or embarrassed about the natural process of aging. One way to combat that is to reframe your thinking. “I tell my clients when they’re thinking about things that indicate aging is negative, try and reframe that because words have a lot of power,” she says. “For example, rather than saying, ‘I can’t do that because I’m getting older’ say ‘I can do these things because I am experienced.’”
Make changes based on your needs
It’s common for adults to have feelings of fatigue as they get older, but rather than be hard on yourself because of your lack of energy, understand that there are things that can be done to shift the way that your body receives energy. “When you go through these hormonal changes, certain foods are not going to sit well with you,” says Dr. Judith. “So learning about ways that you can potentially modify the way that you eat and the way that you choose your meals and the time that you eat, all those things can be changed and modified so that you have more energy.”
She adds, “This is a change so let’s not gaslight ourselves and say this isn’t happening, or pretend you’re still in your 20-year-old body. This is a part of life and we have to acknowledge it. That means learning about ways that you move, eat, and sleep differently rather than using old habits that were beneficial at a different stage in life.”
Find your community
Dr. Joseph also emphasizes the importance of finding a community. “If you’re around people who are knocking aging, then like that’s toxicity will affect you,” she says. “Surround yourself with people who are like-minded, inquisitive, and curious about ways that that life gets better as you get older. That really goes a long way because cutting out those toxic individuals and behaviors can help support you at this time.”
Practice weight-bearing exercises
“There are things that we can do to prepare for that part of our lives,” Dr. Joseph notes. “Preparedness and learning about it [menopause], and actually doing something to help us to have a better and healthier life is important. This includes supplementing our diet and practicing weight-bearing exercises.” According to the Centers for Disease Control, evidence from a variety of sources indicates that exercise, primarily weight-bearing exercise prevents the age-related decline in axial skeletal mass and, in some instances, increases bone mineral content.
Educate yourself
When you don’t feel like yourself anymore, those emotions can lead to thoughts of internalized guilt and shame. But the truth is that it’s not your fault, and knowing the impact of menopause on your mind and body can go a long way in helping you practice self-care. “Hormonal fluctuations may lead to low energy which can then lead to a decrease in motivation,” says Dr. Joseph. However, because this may not be common knowledge to some women, they can feel like they aren’t passionate about their interests anymore. Dr. Joseph adds, “Make sure that you’re educating yourself and seeing the right provider. If it seems like you’re educating them more than they’re educating you, then you really should get a second opinion. So, try and learn as much as you can.”