Eight minutes: that’s how it takes for young women to be negatively affected by eating disorder content on TikTok, according to a study in PLOS ONE published in August. Compared to women who watched “neutral” content, they felt less satisfied with their body image and had internalized more beauty standards — but even those watching neutral content showed negative effects. Any amount of TikTok, apparently, can lead to feeling worse about how you look.
Of course, it’s not like we don’t know that social media can and does have a detrimental effect on body image, but the time parameter is startling to see. It took less than 10 minutes for those unrealistic body standards to stick in users’ minds, and for them to feel worse about themselves. The study looked at women between the ages of 18 and 28, but parents reading the results might feel worried for their social media-savvy kids who are even younger. If twenty-somethings could feel those negative effects so quickly, what about teenagers?
We already know that social media can push teens towards eating disorders. An article in Frontiers in Psychiatry, published in February 2024, noted that “misuse of social media platforms is likely a significant contributing factor” when it comes to the rise in eating disorders among teens. The authors cited longtime trends like “thinspiration” or “fitspiration” on social media that can “serve as a trigger” for those already struggling — and to which we could add more recent, TikTok-led trends like the “clean girl aesthetic,” “bigorexia,” and even “what I eat in a day” videos, which invite viewers to judge or emulate a TikToker’s food intake. In one 2019 study, increased use of Instagram and Snapchat were correlated with much higher scores on the Eating Disorder Examination Questionnaire, as well as with disordered eating among girls.
The evidence continues to pile up that social media can do damage to young people’s body image. “Diet culture is a multi-billion dollar industry,” points out Sammi Farber, a psychotherapist, coach, and TikToker who specializes in helping clients recover from eating disorders. “Children, young adults, and teens don’t realize that what they’re watching is quite literally brainwashing them in a matter of seconds.”
That’s a scary prospect for parents, and the question becomes: when it takes so little time for teens and tweens (and even adults) to feel the effects of eating disorder content, how can we help them stay safe? When your teens are spending hours on TikTok every night, is there any hope?
The most vulnerable age
By many accounts, social media has just made teen- and tween-dom even harder. “We’re talking about such a malleable age,” Farber tells SheKnows. Kids are trying to figure out their identities, their friend group, and their academics while going through the hormonal chaos that is puberty. The messages they absorb at this time make a huge impact, and social media, where kids are increasingly spending the bulk of their time, has an outsize influence.
Farber believes the unspoken messages are some of the strongest. She points out one of the filters on TikTok Live, which allows users to slim their jawline while streaming. “It literally makes your face smaller,” she says, adding that there’s no option to do the opposite and make your face bigger — or if there is, it’s presented as a joke, as fatness often is. The message? “You need to be smaller in order to look better,” Farber says. It doesn’t have to be said out loud for kids to hear it loud and clear.
The rise of influencer culture on social media is also relevant. Now that “regular people” can become Internet celebrities, they appear more accessible and relatable than the stars we used to only see on our TV screens or splashed across magazine covers. Today, teens and tweens are increasingly looking up to “these average people,” Farber says, “who are just sitting in their bedrooms talking to a screen.” Kids who see that and want to be that are also absorbing the message that they need to look and be a certain way to make that happen — and that if these normal people can do it, they should be able to, too.
And sure, it’s not just eating disorder content taking over. Other schools of thought still exist; body positivity has a stronger hold than it did a few decades ago, and eating disorder recovery accounts are trying to balance it out. But it seems like for every pro-recovery, positive body image video you see, there are 10 more idealizing thinness and everything that seems to be culturally paired with it: bright green juices, spotless white apartments, wrinkle-free leggings, ultra-smooth hair and glazed makeup. It all works to glamorize of an idealized, thin body type that never fully lost its power since its heyday in the nineties and early 2000s. Those unspoken messages — that this is what beauty is — are often so much louder than the voices telling teens that they don’t have to change their bodies to be beautiful and loved.
TikTok isn’t the real problem
But while TikTok and other social media may provide the platform for these messages, they’re not the root of the problem. Social media isn’t creating these movements Farber says; “it’s just reinforcing what people are already thinking.” And when you live in a fatphobic society, fatphobia and pro-eating disorder content will be what teens see.
These videos prey on viewers who have already internalized their messages. Young ones — who maybe aren’t as firm in their sense of self — are all the more vulnerable. “Here’s someone who has struggled with loving their body or connecting to it, or having a healthy relationship with food, and they’re consuming these videos,” body liberation therapist Breah Robinson tells SheKnows. “That further exacerbates the problem.”
Our idea of health and “wellness” is also totally “rooted in image,” Robinson says. You can be healthy at any size, but our idea of health is so centered around weight, it’s nearly impossible to tease them apart. And often, that message is being sold to us from brands and companies seeking to make a profit out of our insecurities, starting from our teens and tweens or even younger.
“There’s nothing wrong with wanting to look a certain way, but we have to know that that still came from somewhere,” Robinson adds. It’s necessary to trace that desire back to its root, “no matter how healthy or unhealthy it may be,” she explains. “Once we can really acknowledge those things, we can take the time to really sort through what serves us and what doesn’t.”
What can parents do?
Look inward first. Both experts see this as a crucial first step for parents looking to protect their teens and tweens from social media’s pro-eating disorder content. “It starts with as a parent learning to unlearn, because a lot of what we value in our society is very harmful for our kids at a very impressionable age,” Robinson says. It’s time to do some deep reflection about your own relationship with food and your body, Farber agrees, “because nothing is more like a sponge than your child looking at you.”
Assess your behavior around food and your body. “If you’re staring at the mirror and you’re tearing yourself apart, and you’re weighing yourself multiple times a day — your kid is seeing all of this,” Farber says. If you serve your kid pasta but you only eat a small salad, that’s sending a message too. “They pick up on it at any age,” Farber adds.
Change your language. One fix you can make right now: Stop referring to foods as “good” or “bad,” Robinson says. Assigning moral value to food is a quick way to steer kids towards disordered eating. Instead, tell them what purpose the food actually serves, Robinson says. Some food, like fruits and veggies, are nutrient-dense; others, like bread and other carbs, provide fuel and energy. Sweet treats might give us a little burst of joy when we eat them, and that’s valuable too.
Don’t set stringent social media restrictions. “The more you tell your kid that they can’t do something, the more they’re going to want to do it,” says Farber — a lesson parents know all too well. Your teen will find a way to do it anyway, and now they’ll keep it a secret. While it’s OK to have some time away from screens together — like at dinner or before bed — telling your teen they can’t follow a certain account or can only spend a certain amount of time online is likely to backfire.
Instead, start a dialogue with your teen. Drop the “you can’t!” and try “Let’s talk about it,” Farber says. Try asking your kid what they like about the posts and accounts they interact with online, and share some posts or trends you like too. “It’s about having conversations and keeping connected with your kids, because social media isolates children,” Farber explains. “The more open you are with your kid, the more open they’ll be with you, and it’s not a one-sided conversation.”
Help them explore what truly serves them. At the end of the day, you have to give your teen some independence here. They have to be able to decide what they do online — because no matter how hard you try to impose controls, they’ll find a way around them. (These are teenagers, remember?) What you can do is help them figure out how they feel their body — not what society is telling them they should think or change. “We’re consumers, and we live in a capitalist society, and we are always chasing after ideals,” Robinson explains. When you don’t have a set of internal, guiding values — or if those values are the very same messages you’ve consumed — you aren’t truly connected with yourself or your body, she explains. But if your teen can figure out what actually matters to them and serves them, that gives them a “grounding place,” allowing them to observe but not be swayed by all the messages around body image.
Be compassionate with your own biases. We’ve all grown up in a culture saturated with fatphobia and diet culture, so it’s understandable if you’ve internalized them. In Farber’s practice, she says she’s seen parents turn on each other over their kids’ body image issues, rather than recognize how their own patterns might contribute. But those internalized issues don’t make you a bad parent, Farber stresses. It’s likely you didn’t know any better. Now that you do, you can move towards healing yourself and helping your teen at the same time.
Reach out for support. You don’t have to do this on your own. If you’re concerned about your child’s relationship to food, Robinson recommends reaching out to a Health At Every Size (HAES) dietitian for guidance. You can also pick up a book or listen to a podcast on unpacking fatphobia or raising a body-positive child. As Robinson says, “It’s never too early to learn or relearn for yourself and your family what a healthy food relationship is.”
Before you go, check out our favorite quotes to help heal your relationship with food: